Okay ! I know it could be named something else as well but yes it has to do something with my engagement as well(^_^)so named it. We come into contact with people as part of society and we are humans so we have to fullfil our needs and desires, depending on which strain you are i.e negative or positive. But how much do we relie on our heart and mind to get to some decision making and interactions is the real matter of thought. If we look at the above statements with googles on, what I really mean is that our heart keep on changing when it comes to likeness and openions about others, but mind on the other hand does not jump into conclusion on the bases of timely needs and physical aspirations, it has to process a matter by proper calculation of ones past, present and future. I'm greatly Soory for those who are Lovers :P, and believe in that thing, off course there are types of love as well which then makes it so much of a different entity. Love lust, love desire and love need are just few. While mind is "mind the reality" thing and not the "for the time being" dream thing. I'm not going to confuse reality with hatred, cause I don't hate any thing or any one, not only because life is uncertain or short for it, but because every human is created by the Creator equal and same but it has it's nature; adapted from society and material world. If I have problem with any thing meaning my mind can't process it for a false positive result, I have my option of simply leaving it to its faith and "mind my business". Now we grow with time, decisions made at an earlier time might be less mature because of mind age and experience, but while going through them; only mind should be engaged. Just to elaborate a bit I had made a decision about the locality and ethnicity of my partner in crime some three years back on very solid and obvious proves and facts, so when brought to spot light again, I still couldn't deny the facts. May Allah have mercy on them and show them the right path. There is a Pukhtun myth about it ; as I'm discussing this mater so would like to share it as well. It goes like "Always be very careful in choosing three things, first is your shoe , if its not fitting you will repent the whole time and will injure yourself with it, 2nd is your place of pee, don't select a place from where your pee will flow back to you and third is your life partner, as in you have made your choice on personal likeness but you alone will have to face his/her past life and present thoughts/desires". Coming back to the topic; following are some of the rules of engagement in a personal life and society. I have practised most of them and they Do Work!
1. Time is a healer , it heals almost every thing, so give it some time. As the poet says; پیوستہ رے شجر سے امیدے بہار رک Meaning stay engaged, keep on breathing and smiling, worries don't live long.
2. Make peace with your past, so it doesn't spoil your present. I have wrote about it earlier. The past is a lesson in memory dump, don't treat it as rubbish dump but don't let it spoil your present.
3. What others think of you is non of your business. Now this one seems very obvious but it's not. Our acts and words are a presentation of our personality. There are set social and behaviour rules based on every religion,culture and ethnicity. Expectations should be based on backgrounds, not only yours but of others as well. You get what you give is the rule of social life, treat a person badly and will be treated likewise in return. Show respect and get it from the worst people. Behave (speak/act) like a bad person and don't expect to be judged as a good one.
4. Don't compare your life with others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
5. You are responsible for your own happiness and no one else. In other words the reason of ones happiness is they themselves, no one can bring happiness to others lives.
6. Stop thinking too much, sometimes it's ignorance that brings peace and content.
7. Keep on smiling you don't own all the problems in the world.
8. Always speak the truth, the root of every worry is lies and deception.
There are many more but these are the most general ones that can be applied to every life. I received them some years back from a friend and wished to share after moulding myself into them.
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